The Poetics of an Odd (wo) Man out

A book for a rose: Dia del Libro 2008

Labels: (mis)adventures, in a different road - Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Spanish culture is romantic in every sense of the word. It’s flair for romance runs not only on its language but also on its traditions and practices. One of the manifestations of this ‘romantic culture’ is their holiday, Dia del Libro (Book Day). In this unique book fair slash celebration, a buyer gets a red rose for every book purchase.

Last Saturday, I had a chance to experience this culture via Instituto Cervantes, which hosted the Dia del Libro affair. There were many cheap Spanish books on sale. Too bad, I can only understand few Spanish vocab so I didn’t enjoy much of the books being sold there. I only bought three books: Escrito en no, PEN: anthology of short stories and a children’s book (which, I forgot the title). Aside from the open house book sale galore, there were poetry and photography contests, Spanish wine and food and of course, PARTYYY.

Of course this event coincided with the nivel 4 qualifying exams. BOO. This, of course, makes it hard for me to enjoy dia del libro and concentrate on the test. I had to come early to study in the Biblioteca. I saw Boni, Donabel, JPaul, Jimmy and Delilah there. (all seriously studying). My teacher in Spanish keeps on telling us that we should enjoy and not study (BI pala si sir). The test is dificil. Muchisimo. There are four parts of the test: Listening skills, reading comprehension, multiple choice and essay writing. I had difficulty in all parts because I didn’t study at all.

After the test, Dona, Cha, Boni and I bonded and talk about the test (aren’t students do that all the time?) and life. I am happy since this is the first time I sit down with my classmates and listen to their histories/herstories (to think they’ve been my classmate for almost a year now). Personally, I feel a lot closer to them now than before.

There are layers and layers of stories on Dia del libro: the charina-ronnie lazaro’s son collision, endless matchmaking jokes, the real-deal, harry potter, and the simple truth-donabel.

I’m looking forward on the next Dia del libro and hopefully when that time comes, I’m a better Spanish speaker. (crosses fingers here)

Usapang bigas at pag-aasawa

Labels: eklaboo, freefalling, subjunctive mood, vital trivilialities - Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Matagal-tagal din hindi nakapag-email ang tatay ko sa akin. Kadalasan bawat araw mayroon yun sulat kahit na kakapirangot ang sinasabi, na ,minsan pa't puro mga paalala at mga kamusta eklaboo. Malamang busy sa trabaho ngayon si tatay kaya ayun makalipas ang isang buwan dun lang nagparamdam. Ito ang nilalaman ng email niya: (na kinatuwa ko)

Hi kumosta uli kayo dyan? at kumosta naman ang trabaho mo IHA? ako okey lang dto,,hay kawawa naman ang walang pambili ng bigas biroin mo ang haba ng pila para lang makabili ng NFA rice nakita namin kasi sa balita dto! nakita namin kong mag kano na ang kilo ng bigas...Mabuti kayo ay may roon pang bigas at bangitin mo sa nanay mo na bumili na ng maraming bigas....e komsta naman si noynoy??? nako kaya ikaw kong mag a asawa ka yong marami ng bigas as practical...hehe uhm..osigi walang pikunan....ingat lang parati..iwasan ang sobrang pag pupuyat baka lumabas ang tagyawat...

Natatawa ako kasi andami naman pwedeng sabihin like mga bilin but NO—kelangan mag-imbak ng bigas. Tapos nagkaroon din ng bagong standard sa pag-aasawa: kelangan maraming bigas. Hehehe.. Haciendero na ngayon ang bagong "ideal guy." Hehehe. Pero seryoso tama din si tatay kasi andami na ngayong naghihirap at swerte pa din kami kasi hindi namin nararanasan yung ganun.

miss ko na tatay ko :(

a song playing in my head...

Labels: freefalling, music and lyrics -

If I were a flower growing wild and free
All I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee.
And if I were a tree growing tall and greeen
All I'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

If you were a river in the mountains tall,
The rumble of your water would be my call.
If you were the winter, I know I'd be the snow
As long as you were with me, let the cold wind blow

If you were a wink, I'd be a nod
If you were a seed, I'd be a pod.
If you were the floor, I'd wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I'd be a hug

If you were the wood, I'd be the fire.
If you were the love, I'd be the desire.
If you were a castle, I'd be your moat,
And if you were an ocean, I'd learn to float.

A Vague Dream

Labels: Tall tales -

Sometime ago, I had this dream of being killed—by my friends. At the onset of the dream or nightmare (for the term dream often connotes happy things), I sensed already that death is coming. An unstoppable event, predicament that made me accept and just wait for death to come. And so death arrives in the form of three hooded figures, all cloaked like dementors. As I sat in my couch, I thought why does God have to put me in this situation? I felt so scared at the thought of dying young. When the three figures approached me, the two held my hands in a sort of crucifixion way and the other one, lifted my head and aimed for my neck. But before the knife pass through my neck, I saw that the killers were actually my friends. Long time friends whom I known since forever (well at least to me it is). Sudden shocked creeps into my system before I lose my breath and darkness envelopes me. The nightmare ends there.

The morning after I asked my friend, Elea (who sorts of interprets dreams) about it. She told me that I’m just doing many things related perhaps to my friends or I’m doing too many things for other people. My unconscious is telling me to stop and to take a deep breath. Apparently, dreams aren’t so literal (thank God). I’m still alive so I guess no one is going to kill who here. In short, I’m just stressed out because I’m doing many things.

Sighs.

The Power of Choice

Labels: soulfoud, vital trivilialities - Tuesday, March 25, 2008

If there is one thing I enjoyed in attending Feast days, (aside from the mass of course) it would be the talk of Bo Sanchez . His witty remarks and words are truly inspiring. He is a kind of preacher that you will really listen to because he’s not didactic and you can sense his genuineness when he talked. . I guess his approach in discussing the word of the Lord is different and sincere. Somehow his words affect me, transform me and make me closer to God. And for that, I really admire him.

For years, I used to attend the LOJ feast day which occurred every first Sunday of the month at AFP Theater. My aunt, who is a member, encouraged me and my family to attend. But after two years, I stop attending for I-don’t-know-reasons. Then last Easter Sunday, while channel surfing, I pressed channel 5 (by accident) where I saw the face of Bo again. I didn’t know that his feast day talks were telecast. He was discussing (I think) how a person can be successful. I didn’t catch the beginning so I only heard a few things.

In his talk, he said, “The difference between successful and unsuccessful people is that they (successful people) exercise the power of choice.” Successful people exercise their right to choose while unsuccessful ones lean on chance. Bo said that man’s inability to decide hampers him/her from getting lots of blessings or good things. What happens is there are times they are blessed and other times cursed… He quoted a writer, “It’s choice not chance that determines your destiny.” In short, we have the power to change our lives.” If there is something we want to change, then we can do something about it. If we want to be happy, then we should decide to be happy. Bo even cited how people tend to cry, “sana maging masaya na ako” (well, I’m guilty of this too) not knowing that they have the power to make that happen. One’s happiness doesn’t depend on chance, it happens when one chooses it despite shortcomings.

Though, I’ve heard these things before, it seems that when Bo said it, it’s something new and fresh to the ears. Or maybe I just really needed to hear these words…

When Bo mentioned ‘low self-worth’ it made me realized that sometimes I tend to see things like ‘I deserve this!’ because mababa tingin ko sa sarili ko. Sad but true…

After listening to this: I feel that by becoming reactive and by letting chance do all things, I didn’t arrive at what I want to arrive at. If I want to be somebody, If I want to go somewhere, I’d better exercise my right to choose…

~photo courtesy of Almiray...

A Game called Futsal

Labels: certain firsts, in a different road - Friday, February 8, 2008

I’m not a fan of sports and I guess sports don’t like me. I don’t have much exposure when it comes to it. PE classes and Volleyball varsity team are the closest things to what I called sports experience. When I was a kid, I wanted to join Milo clinics and be a gymnast but then again there’s an issue called money. If I was exposed to sports then probably I might be a sports lover or even good at any sports. What I really wanted is just to be good at one sport, just one. But then again, I’m not. My body is not coordinated and I can’t seem to do the right position, to remember the rules etc. tsk tsk.

This year I had a rare opportunity of joining Futsal Club in our company (thanks to Jerz). Though I don’t have any background in that sport I signed up just to experience the game, to sweat and to have fun. Last Wednesday, I played my first futsal game along with other officemates. I don’t really know its rules so I keep making mistakes like touching the ball with my hands (that’s one big no no here) and I can’t control the ball itself. I think I’m more on the defense side. All throughout the game I keep running towards the ball because everyone’s doing the same thing. I don’t know the mechanics of this game. All I know is to place the ball in your court and to prevent the other team from scoring. Before we start the game, they (futsal experts) taught us (futsal beginners) how to kick the ball, how to use your feet to stop a ball and so on. I can’t really kick the ball properly. My body has a mind of its own.

The whole time that we’re running I feel my heart is really palpitating non-stop that I thought I’m going to pass out right there. Believe me running to and fro the court could be really tiresome. I was sweating like I never sweat before. After the game, all my hibernating muscles are alive and kicking but I really had fun playing futsal.

Here’s to more futsal games

A Planner for Phoenix the Procrastinator

Labels: freefalling, vital trivilialities - Friday, February 1, 2008

I love procrastination. I love the feeling of adrenalin rush and pressure of last minutes, of buzzer beaters especially when there’s something that needs to be done. I never know when exactly procrastination enters my system, my routine and my life. I can only guess that it began when I was still in High School doing piles and piles of assignments, projects and papers all in one sitting. I was then motivated by the idea of finishing school stuff before the sun shines. (I usually do them during wee hours) Since I always get good grades despite it being a product of last-minute panics, I thought procrastination is healthy even good.

I carried this practice in College and eventually at work. *sighs.* My mentality is when I am pressured the more my ideas come out unlike if I do it ahead of time, I couldn’t write stuff that I really want to say. The thought of impending deadline motivates me to push my mind to think hard and deep. But somehow, it doesn’t buy me time to double check and even edit what I wrote. Tsk tsk

I’m not sure if there are advantages of procrastinating or why people procrastinate in the first place. The only thing I know is its downsides like for instance it compromises the quality of whatever you’re doing be it work or school-related things. You are prone in committing more errors as you panic to finish something before the deadline.

I am aware that procrastination is not good but I can’t really help procrastinate. I know I should be bothered by it but I’m not (so why the heck I’m blogging this?) Actually, what bothers me is lately, I also procrastinate what I feel. Like for example there’s a time when I really want to cry but then again I told myself, I’ll cry later since I have something to do. Sighs

Other news:

Just yesterday, I got my own Starbucks planner for 2008. I was thrilled to finally own one. Never really thought I could have one considering that I’m not a Starbucks addict and I don’t have the money to complete the 24 stickers until the deadline, which is initially Jan 15. Luckily, the deadline was moved to Feb 15.

This planner is special because it’s a labor of love and a symbol of teamwork. LOL. I couldn’t have completed the required number of stickers if not for my colleagues at work: Jerz, Mayee, Macky, Jake, Tin and JM. They’re the ones who made it possible as they donate stickers just to help me. Actually, out of 24, I only contributed 4 or 5 stickers. Hehehe.. Thanks guys!!

Now that I have a planner, I’m going to record day to day memories there. I’m not really going to put my plans there because I don’t have any plan at all especially with my life. (another problem which I have yet to address). Hopefully, those pages will be filled with nothing but good memories.